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0:00Chow Chow0:02Geez, how can somebody that old say something that stupid?0:07I know about white people too.0:10Like when they talk, they say the whole word like this.0:16Why did he even move us out here?0:20Probably did it just to make us miserable.0:22And white people take time out to study.0:25I hate this place.0:27And white people arrest you.0:30Man.0:38Looks like a fish.0:40Damn thing looks real.0:42Can I have my gun back?0:44OOOH! Son of a-0:46Get-getting-0:48A garden party? Yeah, boy!0:50I might go buy some sandals and new underwear.0:52Oh, you shot me! Granddad tried to assassinate me!0:58Are you sure that vest will stop this shotgun?1:02Man, I'm like the Terminator in this vest1:09What, you don't believe me?1:12Go ahead!1:14Pull the trigger1:16Now are you sure that-1:17I SAID PULL THAT TRIGGER NOW!1:20You wanna play rough?1:22Okay!1:23Say hello to my little friend!1:28Fuck y'all looking at.1:42The hip-hop community is trading in their gold chains for gold showers.1:48Hip-hop singer R. Kelly is on trial again this week1:51for sharing some of his liquid bling with yet another underage girl.1:56Some advice for Mr. Kelly. Next time, use a golden shower curtain.2:00And keep your golden showers to yourself.2:02What's wrong with a man giving away a golden shower?2:05Sounds like a nice gift to me.2:06What?2:08Shoot, I wish somebody gave me a golden shower.2:11One, I like gold. Two, I like showers.2:15Put it together. Hey, that sounds like the light.2:19If you good Santa Claus might give you a golden shower for Christmas Christmas My man sent us And controversial R superstar R Kelly will be heading into court tomorrow for the first day of his latest highly anticipated trial for child pornography and lewd acts with a local minor2:42Granddad, can you take us into the city tomorrow to watch the R. Kelly trial?2:46Hell no! But you can walk.2:49It's 40 miles.2:51All the money I spent on them damn nikes?2:53Heh, you better just do it.2:55Assistant District Attorney Thomas Dubois is leading the prosecution of Kelly2:59and has a mountain of evidence against the famous R&B performer,3:03including a videotape allegedly showing Kelly urinating on a 14-year-old girl,3:08which is widely available for download at www.freetop.com.3:13I'm gonna go, uh, check my email. Yeah.3:21Get your little short ass back here!3:28Hey boys!3:33Hey there, Huey. Riley.3:35I couldn't help but notice your sign, and I hope you boys aren't too upset about me having to prosecute Mr. Kelly.3:41Hey man, you do what you gotta do.3:43Why R. Kelly, huh? What did R. Kelly do to you?3:46What does it do to you?3:47He's accused of relieving himself on an underage girl on tape, which is against the law.3:52Okay, okay, okay.3:53But let's examine this whole peeing thing so I can pee in the toilet and it's okay.3:59But if I pee on a person, it's like not okay?4:02Well, yeah.4:04Well, what if I'm peeing and Huey's in the bathroom and I accidentally pee on Huey?4:10Should I go to jail?4:11What the hell would I be doing in the bathroom while you're in the bathroom?4:14Hold up, hold up. Remember when we used to sleep in the same bed when we was littler?4:18From time to time I'd have a little accident.4:21You still do.4:21Shut up!4:22So, Mr. Dubois, Mr. I-wanna-lock-niggas-up-for-peeing,4:28what's the statute of limitations on bedwetting?4:30Why not prosecute me and R. Kelly at the same time, huh?4:34Now, Riley, no one's going to prosecute you for bedwetting.4:39And you shouldn't.4:40It's a natural bodily function and now every nigga in the world gonna be scared to pee. I may never pee again4:47Riley it was a little girl. Oh, I seen that girl. She ain't little. I'm little. Yes4:54Gary Coleman little Yes Minnie me is little Very And to the best of my knowledge We all managed to avoid getting peed on so far But what about the victim Oh yes5:05victim at what point is personal responsibility5:08Become a factor in this equation. I don't think that I see piss coming. I move hmm. She saw piss coming5:14She said yeah, she did watch it. I have to miss that on the next r. Kelly album. Just for it5:21Hey5:22You just got beat by an eight-year-old and if R. Kelly goes to jail, I'll piss on your cat.5:29Let's talk to another R. Kelly supporter.5:31Oh, you there, urban youth. Why do you think R. Kelly is innocent?5:34If I started peeing on you right now, would you A, smile and ask for more or B, move the hell out the way?5:42But before you answer that, let me ask America, has pee ever really hurt anybody?5:48And I want to give a big shout out to my Harvey Devo!5:51What's up?5:52Okay, that's enough.5:54Get off me! Get off me, Huey!5:57Free R. Kelly!5:59Hey man, you got his card? He's good.6:03Did you wash your hands?6:06And stop the damn dancing!6:08Act like you got some goddamn sense, people!6:10Damn! Dude playing around here!6:15Boo!6:17Hey, you with the apple!6:19Give it a rest! Beat it!6:22Put the music back on!6:26That's right! I'm back to New Yorker, nyucka!6:30What you gonna do? What you gonna do?6:34Oh, hell no!6:36Grandad, let's whoop this niggas ass right now!6:41Bitch ass, faggot ass, punk ass, pussy ass, bitch ass, nyucka!6:45You wanna do something? Bitch ass nyucka!6:49Hold up!6:51I smell new shoes!6:54Oh, me!6:56Oh! What's your name?6:58I've said it before.7:00Expensive sneakers are like a hundred and fifty dollar landmines.7:04Step on one and BOOM!7:06A perfectly rational black man can explode.7:09Yeah! They new anymore, are they?7:13Never!7:15And that nigga spittin' on you! You better hit him, Green Dead!7:18Hit him! Hit him!7:19Get him!7:20Yeah!7:21Get him!7:22Oh, man!7:24What happened My bad knee Oh la lordy lord My knee My bad knee Man you lose all your pimps daddy7:38This fight is over.7:40I can't believe you got your ass kicked by a blind man, Granddad.7:45My knee went up. You know I got a bad knee.7:47Bad knee? That nigga had bad eyes.7:50He couldn't see, Granddad.7:51He beat you like a pinjata.7:53No.7:55Yo, we can ring Granddaddy out for Mexican birthday parties.7:59We can call him Señor Piñata.8:03Hola, Señor Piñata.8:05Stop it, boy! Stop it!8:07Where's my belt?8:11I must be blind too,8:12because I sure didn't see that ass-foot be coming.8:16Boy.8:18Yo, how bad you got to telegraph your purchase8:22for a blind nigga to see him coming, Granddad.8:25Riley, the man obviously had a heightened sense of hearing.8:27Oh, I thought Granddad had a heightened sense of falling.8:30No, that's enough.8:31Now, you just stop laughing at your Granddaddy.8:33It ain't that.8:33What's wrong with you?8:34Granddad had hit me written on his forehead in prayer.8:37I said that's enough.8:39Okay.8:40What you gonna do?8:42Beat me?8:43Maybe I should get a blindfold first.8:45Okay.8:46I'm ready.8:48Wait.8:49Maybe he gonna fall on me.8:52Riley, stop!8:54Granddad, Riley King just called and said,8:58Damn, I thought I got my ass whooped.9:03Ow!9:06Niggas.9:07A nigga moment isn't necessarily over when you think it's over.9:11It kinda hangs around like an unpaid bill.9:13And in the case of the blind beating the dumb,9:16security cameras from the Woodcrest Square Mall9:19captured a fight between a black man and an unidentified assailant9:23following a parking dispute.9:25Oh, man.9:26It's just local news.9:28CNN has now confirmed that it was this man,9:30Robert Jebediah Freeman,9:32who got beat up by a slightly older, significantly blinder gentleman.9:36Police aren't pressing charges against Mr. Freeman.9:39They say that ass-whooping was punishment enough.9:42We at CNN agree.9:43Grandad, I don't think you should watch this anymore.9:46El residente de Woodcrest, Robert Freeman,9:49tiene un nuevo apodo, Señor Piñata.9:56Oh, patty.9:57Grandad, you gotta ask yourself, would you10:00Would you really be better off if you had beaten up a blind old man in the street?10:04It was a nigger moment, Grandad. You gotta let it go.10:07Maybe. You're right.10:09You have reached the Freeman residence. If this is a lovely cutie pie, please leave a message.10:15Everybody else will just hang up right now because I'm not interested.10:20Come on, Robert. Pick up the phone. Pick up the phone. I know you there in hiding.10:25I seen you on the news getting your black ass whooped by that blind old monkey.10:30That's why they shouldn't let niggas go shopping.10:32Call me back.10:34Don't you walk away from this answering machine.10:39Granddad, just let it die.10:40I promise you nobody's gonna call you a punk.10:43I will.10:45Well, Riley will.10:47I can't believe Granddad went back to fight that man.10:52Yeah!10:53Check this out, Huey.10:59Alright, alright.11:01Wait, wait, wait.11:03Watch, watch, watch this. Here it go. Here it go.11:07Oh!11:15Hey, you ever notice whenever someone throws a chair, a bra jumps off?11:20Aren't you worried about Granddad?11:23Look, you wanna see it again?11:26Hey look, look, you look, look, see?11:28I said you don't even have to hit nobody with a chair.11:31And niggas would still start wildin' out.11:41Well, you don't look hurt.11:43Two weeks.11:45Good for you! A rematch in two weeks!11:48This'll be great!11:49Hey, we might be able to make some money off this!11:52The Slug Fast and Woodcrest, yeah!12:01The fight had a huge tournament.12:06Seems like watching niggas act stupid is becoming America's favorite pastime.12:12Hey, listen up! I'm gonna tell y'all one more time!12:15This fight ain't starting till I get $10 from all y'all!12:19Hey, you!12:21Nah, nigga, I didn't get yours yet!12:23Gimme that AHHHHH AHHHHH What Come on now Oh my god I can believe it I can12:41Dang, granddad, you didn't have to kill him!12:44And so, granddad emerged from the nigger moment victorious.12:48Congratulations, Robert. I told you a nigga that black couldn't fight.12:52Whoo!12:53Good going.12:54Hey, that wasn't even worth it, man!12:56I had my fingers crossed!12:58You owe me money, man!13:00Give me my money back!13:02I want my money now!13:04Give me my damn money, kid!13:10Oh my God, it's Shared!13:17I'm mad, man!13:19Come out! Come out!13:24Niggas.13:26As he contemplated spending the remainder of his natural life in prison,13:30Grandad never stopped to realize that he had gotten the respect he so desperately wanted.13:35Yo, that mug killed a blind old man with his bare hands.13:38Now that's gangster.13:41Robert Jebediah Freeman.13:43Tom and I had gotten the fight license by the state boxing commission at the last minute,13:50legally indemnifying Granddad against Stinkmeanor's death.13:54But he was still pretty shook up by the whole thing.13:58Colonel Stinkmeanor had no family and no friends.14:01He lived a life without love or companionship or even pets.14:06He was a horrible, awful human being, and in truth, the world was better off with him dead.14:11Still, he was our brother.14:13Lord, please forgive us for taking this man's life.14:15Why you say us? You killed him.14:18Shut your ass and pray, boy.14:22Hello?14:23Riley, is that you? Put your brother on, it's an emergency.14:26What's the emergency?14:28I'm in jail.14:33Don't drop the soap.14:35Who's that?14:41Yeah?14:42Riley, it's Tom!14:44I thought you only get one phone call from jail.14:47Who's this?14:48Billy!14:52So y'all was in Iraq together?14:54Yeah we was in Iraq What did you do We was looking for weapons of mass destruction Did you ever find them15:05You know goddamn well we ain't find them.15:07What are you, some kind of political humorist?15:09You Gary Trudeau up in this bitch?15:11I was looking for bitches, but they had that carpet shit all over them,15:13and I couldn't see what they looked like.15:15All that was really exposed was the eyes,15:17and that wasn't enough for me, cause you know,15:19shit, I'm looking at the eyes, the eyes could be pretty,15:21and I take that carpet off, and then I got a tragedy.15:25Well, no, we ain't fine. But I always say the absence of evidence is not the evidence of absence.15:32What?15:32Simply because you don't have evidence that something does exist does not mean that you have evidence that something doesn't exist.15:39What?15:40What country you from?15:43What ain't no country I ever heard of. They speak English in what?15:47English, motherfucker! Do you speak it?15:50Yeah.15:51So you understand the words I'm saying to you?15:53Yeah.15:55Well, what I'm saying is that there are known knowns and that there are known unknowns,15:59but there's also unknown unknowns.16:01Things we don't know that we don't know.16:04Say what again?16:05Say what again?16:07I dare you.16:08I double dare you, motherfucker.16:10Say what one more time.16:13We now return to Gangstalicious Resurrection.16:15Resurrection?16:16Then again dead.16:17Shh.16:18He been shot a bunch of times, aye?16:20At least he trying.16:21By late last year, the ongoing feud between Gangstalicious and his crew from New West Manchester, Delaware...16:28Yeah, nigga, what's hood?16:29...and Eat Dirt and his crew...16:31FOOL!16:32...from Lickety Split, Virginia, had escalated to the brink of catastrophic warfare.16:37Catastrophic warfare? It's just some dumb niggas beefing.16:41What you talking about, fool? This is war!16:43Yeah, the nigga version of the Cuban Missile Crisis.16:47Tensions exploded at an awards show last year when a chair...16:51was thrown at E-Dirt.16:56All I'm saying is, you know what I'm saying, shit's real.16:58You know what I'm saying? Shit just ain't music, right?17:00You know what I'm saying?17:01This is some bonafide, unimpeachable, gangsta shit.17:04You know what I'm saying?17:05It's some indubitable shit, nigga.17:07What he said, Nyoko.17:09Yeah, man, you motherfucker don't think I know something more than your pick on your foot, man.17:13Nigga, what the fuck with that, nigga?17:15Come on.17:17Look here, man.17:19A lot of these niggas trying to have what we didn't have,17:21but they ain't done what we done done17:22to have what we didn't have, you know what I'm saying?17:24Especially you Licious You ain done nothing Then later that year an altercation in a Miami nightclub between Gangstalicious and Eat Dirt ended in violence In the resulting struggle both rappers accidentally shot themselves17:57Man, when I got shot, I was like, you know, never again.18:03That ain't never gonna happen to me again.18:08What's up, world?18:09I'm Sway, and this is my inexplicable head rap.18:13We interrupt Gangstalicious' resurrection for this breaking news story.18:17Rapper Gangstalicious has been shot.18:20Again?18:21Again.18:27I was so desperate for information on the shooting, I watched that show my brother calls the news.18:33Oh shit!18:34Oh nigga, I seen the whole thing nigga, you should have seen that shit, I saw it nigga.18:40Oh great, black eyewitness man, I hate black eyewitness man.18:44Nigga shush!18:45With my own eyes nigga.18:47Damn that shit was crazy nigga, I seen everything.18:50Hold up.18:51Nigga that's me on TV baby, yeah nigga, yeah.18:56I ain't got your money, nigga.18:59Oh, Jesus!19:01It was terrible!19:03I was in the club, and I was in the club,19:05and this bitch stepped on my shoe,19:07and I was like, bitch!19:09And then some nigga started shooting.19:10I was like, there he go!19:12He done fucked it up for everybody!19:14So, what had happened was,19:16Gangsta Delicious was doing a show in town19:19when three men rushed the stage and shot him.19:22Ironically, he was doing his new joint.19:24I got shot.19:25At the time.19:27I got shot.19:38I got shot for real.19:40I got shot for real.19:44I'm bleeding.19:45I'm gonna die.19:45Somebody please help me.19:47Help me.19:47Help me.19:53It was 45 minutes before anyone19:55Don't call the NAMI lands.19:58Gangsta Licious got shot!20:00Again?20:01We got to do something.20:02I got an idea.20:03Let's go to college so we don't end up like Gangsta-licious.20:06That boy got shot again?20:08That's a shame.20:09A shame?20:10Granddad, a nigga stepping on your sneakers is a shame.20:14This is a catastrophe.20:16It's catastrophic.20:17Can I go to the hospital and visit Gangsta-licious?20:20Boy, are you stupid?20:22Mmm, I don't think so.20:24Look, Gangsta-licious needs his street soldiers to protect him.20:28The hospital's only 15 minutes away!20:30I said no!20:35It is a shame.20:37It's a damn shame.20:43My family didn't understand about being a street soldier.20:46Gangsta-licious needed my help.20:48I had to get to that hospital.20:58Oh, no! I'm falling down the steps!21:03Okay.21:08My shoe!21:13Ow!21:17I fell down the steps. I gotta go to the hospital.21:23You ain't going to that hospital.21:25No, really. I can't get up.21:28Where's the love?21:40Hospital get your little butt up try pull that bull jive on me come on21:49Where is your glass boy glass I don't need no glass I takes mine to the head21:58Oh.22:00Oh.22:02A full day's supply of vitamin C.22:09Ow!22:10Boy, have you lost your mind?22:12How are you gonna drink my orange juice out of the carton?22:14I don't know where your nasty lips have been.22:16I know one thing.22:17I ain't going to the store to get no more.22:20See, I was like all in the granddad's mental mind.22:23It was like psychology but in reverse the store and back That it No hospital take my phone so I can reach you but don call anyone22:36Dad granddad is that a cell phone or a cordless payphone shut up22:41This thing looks like a laptop22:46Stay away from that hospital22:48I headed straight for the hospital nearly a week it passes the shooting and things seem like they was back to normal22:55Excuse me, I'm looking for Gangstalicious.23:00And who are you?23:01I'm one of his many illegitimate children.23:05Fifth floor.23:25Thanks delicious.23:30Huh.23:33Hey, what's up little man?23:35Who are you?23:36Hey, uh, my name's Riley and I'm one of your fans.23:42That was close.23:43Come on in.23:46Hey, I live around here and I just wanted to let you know that, you know, it wasn't nobody in my crew that did the shooting.23:53Yeah, yeah, I appreciate that little man23:58Does it hurt what this no no oh24:06No, no, no, hey, I'm fine. I'm chillin man. Hey man, you wanna hang out for a little bit?24:11Get that chair over there real quick. Yeah, don't worry about it. I ain't Michael Jackson. Oh24:15You said Michael Jackson man. That's funny. Gakes delicious24:19So who you think it was that tried to assassinate you?24:24Was it E-Dirt?24:25No, no, it wasn't E-Dirt.24:27It was these dudes I used to owe money to back when I was in the drug game.24:31Wow, that's so real. The drug game.24:35Word. That's real spit dun dun dun dun.24:38That's why I tell kids like you, the drug game is cool, you know, but in some ways, it's not cool.24:45But mostly it's cool.24:47Well, I know getting shot must be cool.24:50You think they gonna come back?24:52Hell to the knees, y'all.24:54After I got shot I was like God is watching over me You know it like that nigga from Pulp Fiction said God got involved God is gangsta nigga So anybody wanna come get me They gotta go through God I don feed no man but God25:09You know what I'm saying?25:10Besides, ain't nobody gonna come up here to get us cops everywhere.25:13I didn't see no cops.25:15Hmm?25:16There ain't no cops out there.25:19Nope.25:20Not any hospital security or nothing?25:22Nothing?25:23Not that I saw.25:24You sure?25:25I mean, they said they were gonna stay till I was, you know, till I left.25:28I mean, not that I want them there, because I don't.25:30You know what I'm saying?25:31I'd probably shoot them or something if they was there, but, you know, they just supposed25:34to be there.25:35So, I wish they...25:36Are they there?25:37Could you check?25:38I'll check again.25:39Yeah, yeah, you do that.25:42We're looking for Gangstalicious.25:56We're well-wishers.26:00I got that thug in love.26:04What's the big deal about them?26:06What's his name?26:07Bubbalicious?26:07It's Gangstalicious.26:09Dumb niggas love Gangs Delicious the way fat women love Oprah, Grandad.26:18What the hell is thuggin' love? Who we want thuggin' love?26:21Is that when you make love to your woman, then right before that special moment,26:25you beat up side your head, snatch a purse, and throw it down the stairs?26:30Where the hell is that boy?26:39Oh!26:41Oh!26:43Where's my goddamn orange juice, boy?26:47You hear me?26:49What you doing, growing the oranges?26:51Uh, the bike got a flat, Grandad.26:53But everything's cool, I'm walking to the store.26:55My God, that's a big phone.26:57I am a collector of incredibly large antique electronics.27:01Can I buy that from you?27:03Go away!27:05It's so big.27:07It's so big.27:09I'll give you 50 bucks for it.27:11Get the beans anyway, and bring me a can of that spray.27:14Okay, okay, 70.27:15Uh, while you're ready, give me your eggs.27:17Hey, hey, homie.27:18You know I gotta have my eggs and my orange juice.27:20Uh, uh.27:22Yo, hold up, little man.27:24All right all right bye One hundred ten dollars It enormous Move can be worse Let me see27:43Close, close, close!27:45Damn!27:51They're flawless, smoke, smoke!27:53Come on, go, go, go, go, go!27:55I'm telling you, Bernie, the police left.27:58Well, the label should be providing the security. This is bullshit.28:02No, no, no, that is unacceptable.28:04I just got my black ass shot here, and all you got for me is...28:07Hello? Hello? Bernie?28:12Niggas! Coming!28:19Come on, man, this way.28:23Other folks talking about save me. Wasn't nothing wrong with slavery.28:28Least we got good food back then. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. White man sure could be your f-28:35Where's Gangsta Nicious?28:42If I say that again, I couldn't hear you over the sound of me shitting myself.28:53We now return to Gangstalicious' Resurrection.29:01The judge allowed Gangstalicious' music to be introduced as evidence at his assault trial.29:06They played for the jury, a track called Play It For The Jury.29:10Play it for the jury that defended and painted.29:12Court reporter and the leader.29:14Play it for the jury that defended and...29:16I keep telling these people this shit is supposed to be just music, you know what I'm saying?29:21I mean, you really think about it, is it worth it?29:24I mean, somebody could get hurt.29:26That boy don't look that tough to me.29:29Man, Riley should be seeing this.29:37Damn, nigga, you short.29:39You don't understand.29:40I know this guy, he is crazy.29:42He like, got a chemical imbalance or something.29:44I'm just saying, man, you look much taller in the videos.29:48Do you hear what I'm saying to you?29:49The niggas are rageaholic.29:51We're both gonna die.29:53W-what happened to, I don't fear no man but God?29:56Correction, God and the nigga, the shit out there.30:00Oh lord, what is we gonna do?30:02Man, just get yourself together, you're making me scared!30:07Hey, I'm tripping, man. You got a nigga medicated and shit.30:11It's the painkillers and, you know, sucres and shit. I'm cool. I'm cool.30:23There they are! Right over there!30:27Thanks. Now go change your pants.30:30We're gonna die!30:34Run, nigga!30:36Hold on, nigga!30:37Where's your gun?30:41Oh, yeah, yeah.30:43Y'all niggas is in for it now!30:54We need a car.30:55We're gonna have to jack someone.30:57Where's your gun?30:58I'm trapped again.30:59You dropped the gun what's done is done. Let's be solution oriented31:04You man how you gonna drop the gun gangsta licious that is not gangster31:09That's very not gangster man. I can't believe this to a fraud. Oh, I'm a fraud. You scared, too31:16I'm eight31:18Okay, fine, fine. Whatever. I'm a fraud. I'm a fraud. I'm just the average normal dude31:22I don't want to do this stupid shit no more. I'm tired of getting shot help31:26Help!31:27It's like going to heaven and finding God smoking crack!31:30Holy shit! I can't believe it's you!31:34Dude, you're the shit! Thug in love? What?31:43So, uh, I'll just wait here then?31:50Oh God, where are we gonna go?31:52To the airport! You got your jet there, right?31:54What jet?31:55Then J4, the one in the bitch on fly video.31:58We rented that jet.32:00Oh, unbelievable, man. You broke too?32:05Oh, man, I wanna go home, man.32:08I was gonna listen to my friend dad.32:12Yeah, you gonna get us killed.32:16Put your seatbelt on. It's the law, and it's a good idea.32:20Man, just go faster.32:25I said that Ow I told you put your seatbelt seatbelt on but no little niggas gotta do their thing32:35I got this nigga now.32:39Slow down, nigga!32:51Sup now, niggas!32:53Open the door!32:55Mm-mm.32:56Open! Hey, open the door!32:57Mm-mm.32:58If you don't open this door...33:00I told you this nigga was crazy.33:10You know who my favorite rapper was when I was your age?33:13Ice Cube.33:14The dude that makes family movies?33:17He was a gangster rapper?33:19He was so gangster.33:20I used to have dreams that Ice Cube came to my house and killed my whole family.33:24And for some reason I thought he was so cool and I wanted to be him.33:28And when I started to act like that, like a killer, people like me, girls, you know, whatever.33:33But I really wasn't that person who finally caught up with me.33:37I'm sorry you got caught in the middle.33:44Please, Lincoln, you are taking this shit too far. This tape is itchy.33:49Should have thought of that before you did what you did, Frederick.33:52Look guys, don't kill him. Whatever he did, he ain't do nothing to deserve this man.33:59This is about things you're too young to understand, little man.34:03This is about thuggin' love.34:10I love you, man.34:12What?34:14You broke my heart, man.34:17What? What the?34:18I got that thuggin' love.34:21Oh, God!34:22I've got that fucking hell.34:24Oh, man!34:26These niggas are still kissing.34:28Yeah.34:29Oh, they busting slime!34:32Oh, man!34:34I can't take it.34:38I was on tour!34:40You gotta understand I was lonely!34:42Oh, God!34:44Turn around, nigger!34:46Walk forward, nigger!34:48We could have had a life together man What my thinking Hey Hey Hey35:05Hey!35:07Hey!35:17Shit, we missed!35:19I can't believe this, man. We suck.35:23Hey, get back here!35:25Hey, man.35:27Come on, man.35:29Do you see him?35:31I can't see anything, man.35:33Yo! How you up? Where you at?35:35I'm off and wait around there.35:37I can't believe that damn boy.35:39And then they threw us in a trunk,35:41and then they was about to execute Gangsta Lishks.35:45And don't come back with no orange juice.35:47And that's when one of them dudes knocked me outside my head, right?35:51Crazy dreams like Gangslicious was kissing the other dude.35:55Some old craziness man anyway.35:58When I came to, they was gone and I came home.36:02What are these kids doing today?36:04And you really shot one of them dudes at the hospital?36:07Oh, hell yeah. See, Gangslicious dropped his gun, right?36:11And I picked it up and I was like, kaplow, kaplow.36:14It was like some old John Wolfe shit.36:17Let me take my medication.36:18And me gangsta unless you start crying and shit and I'm like, quit crying you little bitch!36:23You should've seen me, I was so gangsta!36:27What the heck is going on around here?36:33He knows when you can sleep.36:35Alright.36:36He knows when you're awake.36:38He knows if you've been mad or good, so be good for what?36:43Goodness sake!36:44I should be good for this!36:46Think about that.36:48Be good, for goodness sake.36:51Who's sake?36:53Speak, sister, speak!36:56It's time to take the ho-ho-ho-ho36:59of the music videos37:01and put them in your mouth.37:03Somebody say ho-ho-ho.37:05Ho-ho-ho!37:06Nowadays, people think ho-ho-ho37:08means the Hilton sisters37:10standing next to Nicole Richie.37:12Now that ain't no ho-37:16The37:19UPS37:22They can ship the package But wait a minute I know a man with a different kind of guaranteed overnight delivery He got his own overnight express37:55I don't know.37:56I don't know.37:58Oh.37:59Praise Santa.39:26What are you doing?39:27I'm writing a letter to Santa.39:29Dear Santa,39:32you are a bitch nigga.39:35Wait, wait, wait, hold up, hold up, hold up.39:37Dear Santa,39:39you are a bitch ass nigga.39:43I heard the mall is hiring extra security to protect you.39:48That's a bitch move, Santa.39:51I'm coming for that ass again39:54until you pay what you owe.39:57Sincerely yours, the same40:00Santa Stalker.40:04I think you should do a play about what Christmas is really about.40:07Christmas is about how Santa died for our gifts and rose from the dead and moved to the North Pole.40:14And because of that, every year Santa comes down to forgive us our sins and give us eternal presents.40:21Man, Santa these nuts.40:23Where was Santa when we was in the hood, huh?40:26Santa ain't show a nigga no love back then.40:28I didn't ask for much, just rims.40:31Not even the whole car.40:32And what do we get?40:33Nothing.40:34That nigga gonna pay what he owe.40:42That's right, Bob.40:44A little bit of the Christmas spirit is returning to Woodcrest40:47as Santa Claus makes his first appearance40:49since being assaulted by the unknown,40:51but probably Arab, Santa stalker one week ago.40:55And you're gonna protect me, right?40:58Now don't you worry about a thing, Mr. Sandy Claus, sir. I got you covered.41:03Now I know I'm a very large man, but I'm a picture of athleticism.41:09Well, hello there! And what would you like Santa to bring you for Christmas?41:14I want a... Santa, you got a red dot on your head.41:28Oh!41:30Ow!41:32God!41:34That had to pierce a spleen and stop!41:36He died!41:38That was quick as nigga!41:40That's a lie!41:46You gonna pay what you owe nigga You gonna pay what you owe You gonna pay what you owe bitch You gonna pay what you owe41:56Runnin' like a bitch!41:59Ah!42:01Oh!42:02Back up!42:04I need back up.42:09I'm fat.42:10I can't run very fast.42:12I think I'm havin' a heart attack.42:14Got a couple of light sprints.42:21Merry Christmas, you miracle.42:28Why doesn't the real Santa come?42:32Cause there ain't no real Santa.42:39We all want to believe in miracles on Christmas.42:44I heard you work for Santa.42:58I got a message for him.43:01Tell him Riley said I'll be waiting for his ass next Christmas.43:06And that nigga better pay what he owe.43:08Ow!