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0:00Profesh.0:02Are you serious?0:12It locks a conference room.0:15So, uh, you two fuck or what?0:19We kissed, but it was very innocent.0:22Like, cheek innocent or tip of your dick innocent?0:25Okay, stop. First of all, we did not kiss. You kissed me.0:29Second of all, it's none of your freaking business.0:31Whoa, she cussed. Must have been a good one.0:35Robert, this is Invisigal. She is part of the Phoenix program.0:39We take former supervillains, such as herself,0:41and rehabilitate them to re-enter society to use their powers for...0:45Are those my earrings?0:46Well, they look better on me.0:48Invisigal, this is Robert. He'll be your team's dispatcher.0:51A washed-up dad-bot superhero with no superpowers. Can't wait.0:55His identity, all of this, that's staying between us.0:59He's still Mecha-Man, but that can't get out.1:03And if it does, I'll know who it came from.1:06You think I want to tell people our Dispatcher's a fucking loser?1:10Look, you might think these are less than ideal circumstances,1:13but it's something you need to get used to.1:15When you're out on the field, even the best-laid plans can fail.1:18So, out there or in here, we do what we can.1:22We make the best of it.1:25well I'm wet I see why you like him look at that trip what does that look that's1:32my fight club fucking hot but can we clear the channel please there's a lot of1:40Overlapping on this1:54Again what are you guys talking about we're taking bets on when you'll quit1:59So what was your read on this Mecha man guy on it?2:04I know a shortcut for this guy's backyard2:10You can say you not impressed You can I mean you can I just won believe you Yeah nice try dude I not going anywhere Except Granny2:26I got this one. Seriously, don't worry about it. I... I'll be so fine. I promise.2:34I didn't do this.2:35Right, I feel like you've said that a lot in your life. What happened?2:40This is how I found the place. The old guy, who I assume is Granny, was laying here when I walked in.2:45And what's your favorite donut?2:47Look, can you just focus?2:49What, you got ADHD or something?2:50Yes, fucker.2:51Is it that obvious?2:52Yes, fucker, it is.2:54Well, then answer the question.2:57I don't want to sit here and fixate on it when we're supposed to be doing whatever superhero shit.3:02Those long ones with the cream inside.3:05Oh, you like a dick donut?3:07Um, no.3:08They're called...3:09You have big, long, cream-filled dick donuts.3:10I got it, dude.3:11You like your dick donuts up in your throat, in your ass, both of them.3:15Yep. Now, can we maybe address the body in the room?3:20What are you doing? You're gonna poke it with a stick?3:23Check his pulse.3:25Granny's alive. Thank Christ.3:28I don't want to have to lift this guy.3:29So, can I go now?3:32No, this isn't a wellness check. It's a B&E. Let's figure out if the perp is still there.3:35Perp. B&E.3:37Okay, Lieutenant.3:38Fuck, I can't think of a character from a cop show.3:41Dan. Lieutenant Dan? Is that a thing?3:44Yes, I am the legless Vietnam vet from Forrest Gump. Sick burn.3:49Hey, what's taking so long? Are you sleeping or something, or are you just f***ing fat at your job?3:54Perp? D&E? Who are you, Lieutenant Dan?3:57Hey, shut up for a sec. You're not alone.3:59He's coming your way, armed. You need to disappear.4:02Why aren't you whispering, you idiot? You're in my ear.4:05No, now!4:14God damn it. This bitch is a gusher.4:18Be careful.4:19I got this, Lieutenant Dan.4:21Never mind.4:28Got any more great advice?4:32Shook.4:41Shit Ugh Shit4:56Get it now, invisible bitch.5:01Invisigal, just hold him off while he finds a way to help.5:07Fuck.5:37Granny? I don't think you know how to use that thing, so why don't you-5:41Shut the fuck up!5:43Oh, I'm one of the good guys!5:44You? Yeah, right. Don't fuck with me, okay? Nobody fucks Granny! Nobody fucks with Granny!5:52Invisigal, stay calm.5:54Great fucking advice, Lieutenant Dan.5:56Stop calling me, Lieutenant Dan, because the joke doesn't work and you sound dumb.6:00Granny doesn't even know how to shoot that thing. Take out the thief first, he's the only one with his finger on a trigger.6:06You know what? It's my life on the line.6:08I'm done listening to you.6:10That thing's gonna blow that man's arm off and there's a whole building with me in it.6:13Fuck off, I'm disarming the device.6:15No, Invisigal, that's a direct order.6:18Fuck.6:25Oh, fuck. Fuck.6:28Invisigal, you there? Come in, Invisigal.6:32Fuck, this guy's heavy.6:34Hey.6:35Granny's clearly a fan of his own work.6:38Oh, I really wasn't expecting to see that.6:41He's kinda caked up.6:43So where's the prep, Lieutenant?6:45I think he must have had something else to do, cause he left.6:49I mean, this is why you have insurance, right?6:53Jesus Christ, you gotta be fucking kidding me.6:57It feels like a win to me Hey Ah shit What kind of superhero flinches I didn say which superhero chill out7:08If you had people trying to kill you for the last 15 years, you'd be jumpy too.7:12What makes you think my life has been any different?7:14You think growing up surrounded by a bunch of shitbag villains I didn't need to watch my back?7:18I can't just disappear, okay?7:20I actually have to face my problems.7:22I don't know what you're doing.7:24I don't know what you're doing.7:26Okay, I actually have to face my problems.7:29What the fuck?7:30You can't just go around.7:31Ow!7:32Why does he keep screaming?7:33His name's Sonar.7:35Yeah, I know what Sonar means.7:36What's up?7:37Then why are you asking why he keeps screaming?7:39She was just explaining your, um...7:41You know what? Never mind. Good shift.7:44This guy is weird.7:45Yeah, he is.7:46Look, I actually just came by to celebrate the mission going well.7:49Didn't mean to interrupt your little snack.7:52What, do you need to preach you like a little baby bird bitch?7:55Look at me, you disobeyed a direct order. How can you think it went well?7:59You trashed the place. The suspect got away, you got the client hurt.8:02You think when that guy signed up for SD and the Idrisoul in the back of his ball sack getting scorched?8:07Because they don't mention that in the commercials.8:08First of all, the place was trashed when I got there.8:11Second, I'm sure Granny would take some crispy nuts over losing his arm.8:15As far as the bad guy, fuck, shit happens.8:17Fact of the matter is, that shit didn't need to happen.8:19We could have had an outcome where the client doesn't get fried and we get the perp if you had just fucking listened to me.8:24You ask for help, then I can...8:27What now?8:31I make the calls, not you.8:34Here's some advice.8:35You're right at home behind that desk because you're no hero.8:38You were a nerd playing a video game in a suit your daddy built.8:42Now you're a twitchy little bitch turtle without its shell.8:45A real hero puts their ass on the line.8:48A real hero can't just press a button to make their problems disappear.8:51The suit isn't what made me a superhero.8:53It was how I did my fucking job that made me mecha man8:56Based on what I saw today you wouldn't last a day as mecha man cuz there isn't a mech suit in the universe9:02That'll keep you from being a selfish fucking asshole9:18Feel bad good fuck you