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0:00No, no, no, slow down and I'll spell it after you.0:02You're totally rambling. No, I'm not.0:03Lost me. Look, you know how you're having a dream,0:05and in the dream you gotta pee?0:06Yeah.0:07Okay, and then you're like, oh, my God, there's no bathrooms.0:09What am I gonna do? Oh, someone's watching.0:11And then you wake up, and in real life, you actually have to pee.0:14Yes.0:15Yeah. Okay.0:16Everybody has that.0:17Right, that's the point I'm trying to make.0:19Apropos of that, last night, I dreamt, we had a kid.0:23So real.0:25We named him after your eccentric uncle.0:27Uh, what was his name? Right.0:28Morgan.0:29So you woke up and thought that we were...0:32Expecting?0:34Yeah.0:34Yes?0:35No.0:35I had a dream about it. It was so real.0:37If you wanted to have a kid, you wouldn't have done that.0:41I'm glad you brought this up, because it's nothing.0:43It's just a housing unit for nanoparticles.0:44You're not helping me.0:46No, no, this is detachable. It's not a...0:47You don't need that.0:49I know. I had the surgery. I'm just trying to protect this.0:52A few trusses, and that's it.0:53Just in case there's a monster in the closet instead of, you know...0:56Shirts.0:56You know me so well.0:59I'm gonna finish all my sentences.1:02You should have shirts in your closet.1:06You know what we should be?1:08No more surprises.1:09We're gonna have a nice dinner tonight,1:10show off this Harry Winston.1:12Right?1:13And we should have no more surprises ever.1:15I should promise you.1:16Yes.1:17I will.1:21Tony Stark, I'm Dr. Stephen Strange.1:24I need you to come with me.1:26Oh, congratulations on the wedding, by the way.1:30I'm sorry, you giving out tickets or something?1:32We need your help.1:35Look, it's not overselling it to say that the fate of the universe is at stake.1:38And who's we?1:41Hey, Todd.1:42Bruce.1:44Pepper.1:45Green.1:48You okay?1:51By the dawn of the universe, there was nothing.1:55Thanos?1:56Tell me his name again.1:59Thanos.2:00He's a plague, Tony.2:01He invades planets, he takes what he wants, he wipes out half the population.2:05He sent Loki.2:08The attack on New York.2:10That's him.2:11This is him.2:14What's our timeline?2:15No telling.2:16He has the power in space stones.2:17That already makes him the strongest creature in the whole universe.2:20If he gets his hands on all six stones, Tony...2:23Tony You could destroy life on a scale hitherto undreamt of Did you seriously just say hitherto undreamt of Are you seriously leaning on the cauldron of the cosmos Never know2:35I'm going to allow that.2:39If Thanos needs L6, why don't we just stick this one down to garbage disposal?2:42No can do.2:43We swore an oath to protect the Time Stone with our lives.2:46And I swore off dairy, but then Ben and Jerry's named a flavor after me, so...2:50Stark-raving hazelnuts.2:51Not bad.2:52I'm a bit chalky.2:53Chalky.2:53A Hulk of Hulk burning fudge is our favorite.2:55That's a thing.2:56Whatever point is, things change.2:58Our oath to protect the time stone cannot change.3:01And this stone may be the best chance we have against Thanos.3:03So conversely, it may also be his best chance against us.3:06Well, if we don't do our jobs.3:08What is your job exactly besides making balloon animals?3:11Protecting your reality, douchebag.3:14Okay, guys, can we table this discussion right now?3:17The fact is that we have this stone.3:19We know where it is.3:20Vision is out there somewhere with the Mind Stone,3:23and we have to find him now.3:25Yeah, that's the thing.3:27What do you mean?3:28Two weeks ago, Vision turned off his transponder.3:30He's offline.3:31What?3:32Tony, you lost another super bot?3:35I didn't lose him. He's more than that. He's evolving.3:37Who could find Vision then?3:43Probably Steve Rogers.3:45Oh, great.3:46Maybe.3:48But...3:50Call him.3:54It's not that easy.3:57God, we haven't caught up in a spell, have we?3:59No.4:00The Avengers broke up. We're toast.4:02Broke up?4:05Like a band? Like the Beatles?4:07Captain and I fell out hard.4:10We're not on speaking terms.4:13Tony, listen to me.4:16The floor's gone.4:17Thanos is coming.4:21It doesn't matter who you're talking to or not.4:39I'm sorry.4:43I'm sorry.5:02Say Doc you wouldn happen to be moving your hair would you5:05Not at the moment, no.5:25I'm not sure I'm working on this.5:48Hey, you might want to put that time stone in your back pocket, Doc.5:52You might want to use it.6:25That your meaningless lives are now contributing to the balance.6:27I'm sorry, Earth is closed today.6:30You better pack it up and get out of here.6:33Stone Keeper, does this chattering animal speak for you?6:37Certainly not, I speak for myself.6:40I've been trespassing in this city and on this planet.6:43It means get lost, Squidward.6:45He exhausts me.6:46Bring me the stone.6:50Ben, do you want a piece?6:51No, not really, but when do I ever get what I want?6:55That's right.6:58It's been a while.7:00It's going to be good to have you, buddy.7:02Okay.7:03I need a gun to try there for a second.7:06Come on.7:06Come on, Max.7:10Where's your gun?7:13I don't know.7:13We should have been having a thing.7:15There's no time for a thing.7:16That's the thing right there.7:17Let's go.7:17Shut up.7:21Dude you embarrassing me in front of the wizards I sorry Either I can or he won I don Hey stand down Keep an eye on him Thank you I love him Him7:55Where'd that come from?8:02It's nanotech. You like it?8:03A little something.8:05You gotta get that stone out of here now.8:07It stays with me.8:08Exactly. Bye.8:19Tony, you okay?8:20How we doing? Good, Pat?8:21Really, really good. Really good.8:23Do you plan on helping out?8:23I'm trying, he won't come out.8:26Timmer.8:37Hey, man.8:38What's up, Mr. Stark?8:39Kid, where'd you come from?8:41The field trip.8:41Jamoma!8:44What is this guy's problem, Mr. Stark?8:46He's from space.8:48He came here to steal a necklace from a wizard.8:51Oh, yeah!8:53Kid, that's the wizard. Get on it.9:03On it!9:10Mr. Stark, it smells like a new car in here.9:13Happy trails, kid. Friday, send him home.9:15Yep.9:16Oh, come on!9:23Boss incoming call from this potts Tony oh my god are you all right what's going on yeah I'm fine9:31I just think we might have to push our 830 res why just cuz I'll probably make it back for a while9:37tell me you're not on that ship yeah God I'm sorry I'm sorry I don't know9:45I'm going to10:00Wow, you are seriously loyal piece of underwear, aren't you?10:05Yeah, speaking of loyalty...10:08What the...10:09I know what you're gonna say.10:10You should not be here.10:11I was gonna go home.10:12I don't wanna hear it.10:12But it was such a long way down, and I just thought about shooting...10:14And now I gotta hear it.10:15It kinda stuck to the side of the ship.10:16And this suit is ridiculously intuitive, by the way.10:19So, if anything, it's kinda your fault that I'm here.10:22What did you just say?10:23I take that back.10:24And now I'm here in space.10:25Yeah, right where I didn't want you to be.10:28This isn't Quimi Highlands.10:30field trip this is a one-way ticket you hear me don't pretend you thought this10:33i know you didn't you could not have possibly thought this you can't be a friendly neighborhood10:37spider-man if there's no neighborhood10:41okay that didn't really make sense but you know what i'm trying to say10:47come on we got a situation see him down there he's in trouble what's your plan go um okay okay10:54Okay, okay.10:56You ever see this really old movie Aliens?11:02Painful, aren't they?11:05They were originally designed for microsurgery.11:09And any one of them11:10could end your friend's life in an instant.11:19I gotta tell you, he's not really my friend.11:21Saving his life is more of a professional courtesy.11:24You've saved nothing.11:28Your powers are inconsequential compared to mine.11:32Yeah, but the kid's seen more movies.11:37Gotta turn the ship around.11:38Yeah. Now he wants to run. Great.11:41I want to protect the stone.11:42And I want you to thank me now. Go ahead, I'm listening.11:45For what? Nearly blasting me into space?11:48Who just saved your magical ass? Me.11:50I seriously don't know how you fit your head into that helmet.11:53Admit it. You should have ducked out when I told you to.11:55I tried to bench you. You refused.11:57Unlike everyone else in your life, I don't work for you.11:59And due to that fact, we're now in a flying donut,12:02billions of miles from Earth with no backup.12:04I'm backup?12:05No. You're still away. The adults are talking.12:07I'm sorry. I'm confused as to the relationship here.12:10What is he, your ward?12:12No. I'm Peter, by the way.12:14Dr. Strange.12:15Oh, you're using their made-up names.12:16I'm Spider-Man, then.12:20This ship is self-correcting its course.12:22things on autopilot can we control it fly us home stark yeah can you get us home Yeah I heard you12:35I think I'm not so sure we should.12:38Under no circumstances can we bring the Time Stone to Thanos.12:42I don't think you quite understand what's at stake here.12:45It's you who doesn't understand that Thanos has been inside my head for six years since he sent an army to New York and now he's back.12:53And I don't know what to do.12:55So I'm not so sure if it's a better plan to fight him on our turf or his,12:59but you saw what they did, what they can do.13:03At least sometimes turf is not expecting it.13:05So I say we take the fight to him.13:08Doctor, do you concur?13:14All right, Stark.13:16We go to him.13:18But you have to understand,13:20if it comes to saving you or the kid or the Time Stone,13:25I will not hesitate to let either of you die.13:28I can't, because the universe depends on it.13:33Nice.13:34Good, moral compass.13:37Restraint.13:39You're a kid.13:42You're an Avenger now.13:43All right?13:57That was close.14:00I owe you one.14:01Let me just say, if aliens wind up implanting eggs in my chest or something and I eat one of you, I'm sorry.14:07I do not want another single pop culture reference out of you for the rest of the trip, you understand?14:11I'm trying to say that something is coming.14:13No!14:20No!14:41Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, please don't put your eggs in me!14:45Stay down, clown!14:52Dying like it of death Everybody stay where you are Chill the F out15:05I'm going to ask you this one time.15:08Where is Gamora?15:09Yeah, I'll do you one better.15:11Who's Gamora?15:12I'll do you one better.15:14Why is Gamora?15:15Tell me where the girl is, or I swear to you,15:17I'm going to French fry this little freak.15:18Let's do it.15:19You shoot my guy, and I'll blast him.15:21Let's go.15:22Do it, Quill.15:24I can take it.15:24No, he can't take it.15:26She's right, you can't.15:27Oh, yeah? You don't want to tell me where she is?15:28That's fine.15:29I'll kill all three of you, and I'll beat it out of Thanos myself.15:32Starting with you.15:33Wait, what? Thanos?15:34All right, let me ask you this one time.15:37What master do you serve?15:39What master do I serve?15:40What am I supposed to say? Jesus?15:43You're from Earth.15:44Not from Earth, I'm from Missouri.15:45Yeah, that's on Earth, dipshit.15:46What are you hassling us for?15:47So you're not with Thanos?15:50With Thanos?15:52No.15:53I'm here to kill Thanos. He took my girl away. Who are you?15:57We're the Avengers, man.15:59You're the ones Thor told us about.16:02You know Thor?16:03Yeah. Tall guy, not that good looking, needed saving.16:07Where is he now?16:10Yeah, we got one advantage. He's coming to us.16:14We'll use it.16:15All right, I have a plan.16:17Or at least the beginning's the one. It's pretty simple.16:18We draw him in, pin him down, get what we need.16:21Definitely don't want to dance with this guy.16:22we just want the gauntlet.16:24Are you yawning?16:26In the middle of this while I'm breaking it down?16:28Huh? Did you hear what I said?16:31Stop listening after you said we need a plan.16:33Okay, Mr. Clean's on his own page.16:34See, not winging it isn't really what they do.16:37Uh, what exactly is it that they do?16:39Kick names, take ass.16:41Yeah, that's right.16:49All right, just get over here, please.16:50Mr. Lord, can you get your folks to circle up?16:53Mr. Lord, Star-Lord is fine.16:57We gotta co-alize.16:59Because if all we come at him with is a plucky attitude...17:01Dude, don't call us plucky.17:03We don't know what it means.17:05All right, we're optimistic, yes.17:06I like your plan, except it sucks,17:09so let me do the plan, and that way it might be really good.17:12Tell him about the dance-off to save the universe.17:14What dance-off?17:15It's not a... it's not a... it's not...17:16Like in Footloose, the movie?17:18Exactly like Footloose.17:19is it still the greatest movie in history it never was don't encourage this all right we're17:24getting no help from flash gordon here flash gordon by the way that a compliment don forget I half human so that 50 of me that stupid that 100 you Your math is blowing my mind17:36Excuse me?17:38But does your friend often do that?17:43Strange, we all right?17:55Be back, Yara.17:57Hey, what was that?17:59We went forward in time to view alternate futures,18:03to see all the possible outcomes of the coming conflict.18:07How many did you see?18:09Fourteen million six hundred and five.18:12How many did we win?18:19One.18:25Piece of cake, Quill.18:28Yeah, if your goal was to piss him off...18:55I'm not going to die.19:25You throw an Iron Moon at me, then I'm gonna lose it.19:30Stark.19:31You know me?19:33I do.19:34You're not the only one cursed with knowledge.19:38My only curse is you.19:55I'm going to go.20:00All that for a drop of blood.20:30You have my respects, Stark.21:00When I'm done, half of humanity will still be alive.21:09I hope they remember you I hope they remember you21:21Stop!21:28Spare his life, and I will give you the stone.21:32No tricks.21:42Don't.22:02I sorry One to go22:47Where is he?22:52Did we just lose?23:02Why would you do that?23:08We're in the endgame now.23:17Something's happening.23:22Steady Quill Oh man Tony23:51There was no other way.23:59It's dark.24:04I don't feel so good.24:06You're all right.24:08I don't know what's happening.24:12I don't want to go.24:14I don't want to go, sir, please.24:16Please, I don't want to go.24:22I'm sorry.24:36He did it.